Here is some useful - or not so useful - information about me in no particular order of importance:

• I was born on the 29th July 1973. This makes me a Leo, apparently. I don't remember being born but something must've horrified me because I've not been back up one of those things since.
• I spent most of my school life at Hereford Cathedral where I was a chorister and mastered the art of looking angelic. Apparently, buggery was rife in the sixth form but I never found any. My fees were never refunded, despite the disappointment.
• I started a combined-studies degree in Music, Computer Science and Psychology, but academia bores me and I never finished (or really started) it. Although I was there for nearly a year, I never once attended a Psychology lecture. Probably out of fear.
• I am intensely shit at sport and always have been. I bought a bicycle once but the only time it's gone anywhere is when I put it in the back of the car. I prefer watching other people play sport. Preferably topless Eastern-bloc youths.
• I grew up in countryside and moved realised I was allergic to animals. I now share my time between the two.
• I like driving, music, some sci-fi, computers and cute boys who are cheap to get drunk.
• I have a bit of a French car fixation. Currently driving a Xantia, but the DS should be ordered soon... I've been planning the purchase since 1998.
• I enjoy travelling and seem to spend more having holidays than doing the work which pays for them. I currently live in the South of France and work when the gin reserve gets low.
• I play the Piano to Grade 8, the Organ to Grade 8ish standard, the 'cello to Grade 6 and until I was big enough to play the Double Bass to Grade 6. I taught myself a scale on a tenor Saxophone once. I have severely neglected my music of late, although I still sing. My rendition of "Your Disco Needs You" is so emotionally charged it brings tears to people's eyes.
• I do web stuff. I've been doing it since 1995. I'm not sure whether I'm good at it or not but I get paid, so must be doing something right.
• I am always open to offers of employment. If those aren't forthcoming, you could always sleep with me.
• I maintain a diary regularly. It just snowballed. I might stop one day. It's the most up-to-date part of this site and would almost certainly scare my parents.
• I live in hope that someone might, one day, buy me something from my amazon.co.uk wishlist.
• I am not the James Coates who writes for the Chicago Tribune, which is a shame because he probably earns more than me.